What's that noise - why I want to loose weight

Vfft. Vfft. Vfft.

You know the sound. The sound of someone walking down the hallway with corduroy pants on.

Vffft. Vffft. Vffft.

Oh wait. That sound is me. I'm the one walking down the hallway. But I'm not wearing corduroy pants. That's just the sound of my blubbery thighs rubbing together as I walk. I don't need no cord pants to get a musical tune going. All I need are my layers of flubb.

And layers of flubb I have in abundance. All of a sudden I've looked at myself in the mirror and I can't recognise myself. It's like I've gone back to my puppy fat days of adolescence. x5. Mum always said I would grow out of my cute puppy fat. I don't think she thought I would grow back into it again.

I'm a 29 year old, with two kids and a stomach that touches my thighs when I sit down. People, it' ain't pretty.

So I'm going to do what hundreds of thousands of people pledge to do everyday - loose weight. I'm hoping that I differ from those hundreds of thousands by actually succeeding. I've started this blog to keep me honest. To stop me from hiding mars bars under my mattress. To make me reach of apples instead of pounds of butter at the supermarket. You, dear readers, are my conscience. Y'all have permission to kick me up the backside should you see any sugar pass my lips.

So here we go. Operation: loose the blubber. Heaven help us all